From the bindass Chandramukhi in Dev D to the strong, free willing Margarita Kalki Koechlin the half French and half Indian (Kallatty, a village near Ooty in Tamil Nadu) is not the intellectual` girl which people believe. She speaks fluently in Tamil and loves Sambhar made by Revathi with whom she now shares a special bond. A rare B-town talent who proves, shapes and builds her star power by her acting heroics...her latest 'Margarita, with a Straw' has made the towering icons like Mr. Bachchan and Aamir Khan raving about her and the film.. on the eve of her most awaited release I caught her in a relaxing mood anxious about the outcome speaking at length about Margarita and herself.

Over to Kalki

How are you feeling right now

Very much excited thrilled.. Margarita, with a Straw is now out for our Indian audience and am anxious to know the feedback.. moved, touched by the support so far..

Best reaction you received so far

People are coming with all emotions crying, laughing.. Aamir actually made me sit down after the film and asked me how I can bring more and more people to watch the film...imagine Aamir asking me for suggestions.. I said if possible please do tweet.. he is working on something with Shonali to bring the move to blind and disabled people..

What about the reaction outside India

Very interesting. People from the west who don,t recognize me believed me to be a disabled person.

It`s a dream come true...making any actor/actress jealous.. the likes of Big B, Aamir Khan showering all their love and affection to Margarita, with a Straw..is this your grand bollywood dream finally on screen (happening in reality)

That`s amazing..my dream is to work hard and keep getting work be it Bollywood, theatre, Japan, Pluto, Antartica... Wherever.. I want to do work that keeps me involving as an actor and a person.. I love my job and want to be employed.. that`s it.

Laila - the girl people are now talking about.. how did she came to you

Laila was introduced to me via email from Shonali with the script.. I read it and immediately wanted to be Laila..

What makes Laila so special

Laila to me is a human being before anything else..normally our attitude towards disability and disabled person is cliché.. we treat them like someone who is good, special, dhoodh se dhooli, we pity them. We will make a documentary saying that this things and that things should be done for them. We marginalize the subject make it sweet, good all this norms are broken in this film. Laila is a girl she is chalu, makes mistakes she is a normal young girl. When I read the script after 20 minutes I forgot about Laila.. her disability, her wheel chair.. I was thinking and feeling about this girl and her want, dreams and desires...it was an emotional connect with Laila..

The reference points for Laila

Shonali`s cousin Malini who has cerebral palsy. She was the major source.

Apart from here.. films, literature etc

I saw My Left Foot (directed by Jim Sheridan, starring Daniel Day-Lewis), Oasis, a Korean film and The Sessions, which is a film about sessions with a sex therapist. I also saw many documentaries. I saw a lot of YouTube videos of people with cerebral palsy. There are two comedians Josh Blue and Maysoon Zaid - I saw a lot of their work. Then there are lots of videos of people with cerebral palsy putting on make-up, getting ready, going to the loo, normal activities. I also met disabled activist Jeeja Ghosh who is married to a able body activist.. I observed first hand as well, with Malini and the people at ADAPT. I use to practice routines on wheelchair.. like if Laila has to make her breakfast how will she make it.. slowly Laila became a habit..

How was the experience being Laila.. sad, frustrating as you said you started living the character.

It`s frustrating.. yes.. you have hurdles.. you are depended.. you don,t get access to theatres, jobs becomes so difficult.. on the sets I use to wait for someone to get my lunch.. having said that it doesn,t stops them from doing what they want.. look at Malini she is a double MA from Oxford.. we don,t see disabled person in our daily day to day life`s,.. rarely do we find them in jobs, arts, writers etc.... I mean disabled are invisible in daily life`s and that is frustrating.

How easy or difficult is for an actor to do sex scenes which obey or disobey their sexual orientation..

Shonali told me clearly that Laila is unaware of her sexual orientation.. she is experiencing it for the first time.. so for that matter I don,t have to research on how to be gay.. its strange we ask how it seems to be gay.. similarly we can ask how it seems to be straight..

You have shared that love making in Laila made you feel like a virgin again

What I meant was that I am comfortable with my body and when Shonali said about the scene I was ready and excited as it was an important scene needed to be done. On the day of the shoot shooting in a closed set with my director, DOP women, and fifteen other crew it was scary and nervous like a first experience a virgin has during sex.

Some fringe elements believe being gay is a mental disorder.. even if a person who is able bodied and normal in his/her behavior gets tagged for having a certain disorder due to the sexual orientation.. in that sense what is disability and who is a disabled person

Disability is seen everywhere in our society. We are disabled by our own beliefs. We start getting judgmental. By our looks, our dress, they way we speak, our hair, face, age, color, skin..we decide. I have white skin so my character is already decided. We discriminate people who are different from us. We need to be more compassionate. Our education systems should develop more open mindedness and acceptance. Building only for Hindus, building only for Muslims, no dogs, no non- veg, we segregate ourselves, disability is a part of our life`s.

How much 'Margarita, With A Straw' is about cerebral palsy and Laila

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